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At some point whenever you’re breaking into a new profession, you’re going to hear those words—that sentiment—shuffled around and repeated until your brain feels like soggy tofu. It’s how your employer/mentor/instructor justifies the inhuman work hours, the measly pay (if there’s any at all), the belittling of your merits, and the additional stressors that build up and boil over until you start to feel like the a nuclear reactor post-explosion. A giant, temperamental, toxic pool of sludge. 

But it’s alright that you feel that way—it’s normal. Because there has been this established, ritualistic hazing of young professionals across a multitude of professions. Their mentors went through it under the guise of “character building” and now you have to as well.

Pardon my French, but fuck that.

I’ve seen this in every profession I’ve been in—from academia, to science, to equestrian sports, to writing. There’s this inherent culture of taking young professionals breaking into the workforce and grinding them to the dust and eek out any profitable value possible from them before writing them a half-assed recommendation letter or introducing them to the right person for the next step in their professional career. That is, if said young professional miraculously makes it through their hazing.

Luckily for me, not every mentor I have had has possessed this mentality, which is (more than) likely the only reason that I’ve been able to grow in my respective professions. However, those amazing mentors still seem to fall in the minority. I’ve also had my fair share of experiences with senior professionals—employers/teachers/mentors—whose treatment and expectations were honestly inhuman. And so much of it is “justified” because it’s what they went through, so that’s what they expect their employees/students/mentees to go through. Not to mention how exclusionary these standards are, most automatically disqualifying those with disabilities, those at financial disadvantages, and those that don’t have an extensive support system in place for when they have their eventual meltdown(s) due to the unreasonable expectations of their jobs. 

Things need to change. We need to change.

It’s time that we move away from the “it was like that for me, so it’s going to be like that for you” mentality. We shouldn’t be looking at our past sufferings and think that they’re acceptable to knowingly put on our successors—especially under the bullshit excuse of “character building”. 

Trust me, even with a fabulous support system and team of mentors in place, young professionals and students will fail. At some point, they’re going to fuck up. It’s just part of life Those fuck ups will give them plenty of chances at character building—chances to learn how to work through tough times and solve problems. And guess what? If they have a supportive mentor/employer/whatever, they will be able to use those failures as growing points, not breaking points. 

Thanks for coming to my mini rant—I’m sure I’ll pick it up again at some point.